Working with clients sometimes you can really get worked up in your emotions, especially when there's a lot of feedback.
You put blood, sweat, and energy into a design.
Then the client comes back and says all this stuff and you're like, "Oh no, what have I done?"
For me sometimes I do catch myself getting a little bit emotional.
But over the years I've learned not to be emotional and not get attached to my work.
"Designers get paid to negotiate the difficult terrain of individual egos, expectations, tastes, and aspirations."
Paula Scher
THE TRAP
If you stay attached you'll start getting frustrated, angry, and resentful towards your clients.
They will start hating the project.
It's a downward spiral.
One of the things I've learned is just to not be emotional. See everything from a business lens. Be objective. Focus on the goals.
While we're doing this we are adding value to the client. We are doing a transaction as well. We're building a relationship and everyone has different tastes.
THE REAL STORY
I work with one client at the moment and there are two of them.
One has one taste and the other has a different taste. They couldn't really agree on the font choice for the brand project so we have to get aligned on that.
I have to really push back and encourage them to consolidate and make a decision.
Because that's part of branding. You need to make decisions.
DON'T TAKE IT HARD
Don't get sad or upset when someone says it's crap or it's not looking the way it is.
Sometimes clients might talk in a way that might sound very demeaning. They might make you feel less than what you are or what the work is.
And that's okay. Just don't take it too hard.
Take a breath and come back to it.
Read the email or the Slack message. Come back to it later once you've sort of calmed down. Then read through it and respond with a professional tone.
THE COST OF REPLYING ANGRY
It's easy to just get angry or get pissed and start replying.
Then you realise if you say something wrong you could destroy that relationship.
You could make the client feel a certain way.
You don't want to damage that relationship. You want to keep it professional.
Sometimes you do have those moments where you butt heads but that's part of being a human. You have those disagreements and that's okay. That's normal.
WHY SYSTEMS MATTER
This is exactly why I built my Welcome Client Guide and Brand Discovery templates.
Having a system in place from day one sets the tone.
It tells the client how feedback works, when to give it, and how to keep things objective.
When the rules are clear upfront, you stop wearing every comment like a punch to the gut.
THE MAIN LESSON
Don't get attached to your work.
Focus on objectives, outcomes, goals.
Focus on delivering value. Focus on making sure that your client is happy. Also make sure the work you're delivering is top tier so it lasts them 3 to 5 years without needing a refresh.
You want to do a good job and it's good to push back. But you really have to reign in those emotions.
As designers we are so connected to our work. We feel like it's our ideas, our imagination, our thoughts. We feel like someone tramples all over it when we don't expect it.
My 5 step reset when a client message lands wrong
Take a 10 minute break before replying
Re read the message slowly, twice
Ask yourself "what is the real goal here?"
Reply with facts, not feelings
Remind yourself it's a business transaction
PART OF THE GAME
Being a designer, running a business, that's just part of the game. You just got to get used to it over years.
Now for me it's a lot easier.
Some days I do still feel I might get frustrated here and there. Then I come back and think, no, this is my client and I'm here to help them. I just got to focus on getting the job done.
That's what we're here to do as creators, designers, business people.
WANT TO LEVEL UP
If you want to get sharper at running client projects without the emotional rollercoaster, my courses walk through the exact process I use to keep relationships healthy and projects on track.
Check them out at jeremymura.com/designerplaybook.
Have you had a moment where you almost went off at a client? Hit reply on the newsletter and let me know. Always keen to chat about it.
